Not feeling the love this morning.

Yeah, whatever.  Gotta go to church this morning to see my brother.  Just curious.
How is everyone today?
Courtesies paid. 
I had an interesting dream.  But as I try to remember, I forget more.
Wonder how long I can go without eating....

Word art for my sister.

It's a phrase I often tell her. She usually lqughs and says " I don't care."  But in a playful way.
I taped this on the ceiling... right over the bed XD

Bad bad bad bad bad bad mood

There in that McDonald's, my parents and sister are on the laptops shamelessly exploiting the free WiFi internet.  Not that I don't appreciate free stuff-- when it comes to my wallet(and food), I'm as stingy as they get.  It's just that we come here so often, the staff got rid of the wall outlets so we couldn't plain our laptops.and stay here for hours.  It's like, if you want to read your pointless emails and ask me stupid questions about them, just get your own damn internet, and if you can't because a certain *someone* in our house can't be a friggin adult, kick her the help out already!  Stop whining that she's out of control and saying she's gotta move out every single time she hits us and we call the cops but alp that happens is we get laughed at and in the end WE'RE the shitheads for trying to tell someone our problems.  Forgive the run-on sentence.  I guess I'm just frustrated because a second ago my parents were talking to a parent at school about something which they hqve NO business.spreading, because in the end I'M the only one who has to live with the consequences while they go loss off about how so-and-so is a bitch and the world OS unfair but you just have to swallow this BS and ask for seconds.  By the way, why does your sister have a D in this class and an F in that class?  Aren't you helping her?   What do you mean, don't ask me?  What a bitch!  You don't even care.
Well, whatever.  We've all heard this story before, so what does it really matter.  If just screaming in the wind here with my insignificant nonsense.  I mean, compared to the shit that's happening in Japan and the Commies that are taking over the whole Goldman world, not to mention the pending apocalypse that's just around the corner, I probably sound like another one of those smog-nosed brats who'll follow the leftist agenda.and run this country into the ground when her generation takes over.  But you know what?  Everyone's entitled to their own shirt life and I don't have one, so I'm going to rant about it on this Nobody's blog that no one- not even my sister- reads.  Good freaking day to you to.
Life was made a billion times better when we read a short story by Kurt Vonnegut as a precursor to the novel we're being assigned in English class.  We had to watch the movie version to.  I freaking hated it.  I mean, I get what you're trying to tell me: we're going to give up our rights, the government will take over, qnd life will suck.  Guess what?  I ALREADY KNEW THAT, DIPSHIT.  I can't stand any of this sentimental crap anymore.  Who cares?  Nothing anybody says will change the outcome.  I'm giving up on this half-baked world, this imitation of life.  I don't care if I have to wrap myself in some fantasy between books, music, art, and movies.  As long as they're tolerable, its better than a reality.
I'm ashamed of myself.  Just a second ago, a hobo rode up next to the van (where I am blogging away) and asked another hobo to buy him a burger because the staff won't let him inside.  He was going to give him some money and was going to give him 8 cents.for tax, so I opened the door a bit and let him know it was nine cents.  I closed the door immediately afterward so I felt bad when he wanted to talk to me but saw that I didn't want to talk to him, bit that brief connection pit a smile on both our faces.
The world really is terrible, huh?  We watched the movie "Blood Diamonds" in anthropology class today, and I just found out that a girl at my school who did me a huge favor recently went missing.  It's all so unbelievable and terrifying, I don't.really want to believe it.
Well, I didn't get much sleep last bout, so now seems like good time, if ever.  Ciao all, and pardon the jumbled thoughts and.totaled swing.
Seewah

Dinner was rice, corner beef, and a cup of hit chocolate.

I feel so stupid for writing do many uninteresting posts.  Don't I have something better to do in my life?  Apparently not.  I'm not sure what I'm trying to achieve exactly.  Do I aim for fame?  That's hardly likely. Am I just scared of becoming a complete unknown?  Probably.  I think it's mostly the hope that one day I'll actually write something that matters.
Until then, enjoy these worthless posts.

Tonight, I have an unreasonable sense of accomplishment: I practiced piano, took an hour long bubble bath, listened to classical music and Bob Dylan covers, wrote in my journal, and am currently reading the novel "Hotel Iris" by Yoko Ogawa.  I'm feeling artsier by the second.
So glad it's Friday.  This week was a real hitch covet through.  Tomorrow, I'll get started on that dank socio paper.  For now, back to reading, and then on to sleeping! ^_^

It just gets worse everyday

My room.

Darn

I just realized I'm going to have to change my plans for college. On my worksheets, I wrote: I'm going to Harvard for undergrad and Tokyo  university for grad schoool.  The latter'll probably have to change, huh? God, I hope a miracle happens sometime soon in Japan.

And I so wish I went straight!

Okay, so obviously I'm not gay. Matter of fact, after watching "Visitor Q" this weekend, I've probably lost all sense of sexuality whatsoever. It's very sad. I've lost my innocence and can no longer proclaim that I've never watched a porno. I mean, technically it wasn't a porno, but it might as well have been one. *shudders*
While I mourn over something of relatively no importance, many tragic things are going on in the world that I ought to care more about, speaking principally of the disasters that are currently devastating Japan.
I don't have internet for more than 15 minutes at a time, nor do I have any access to television, but from the snippets I catch on Twitter and Facebook (God, who knew that I would grow solely dependent on social networking sites?), it sounds pretty horrible.  What makes this three hundred times worse for me is that I feel almost nothing.  I continue to live my life, read pirated manga, and watch foreign language films without a care in the world. I hate to beat myself up, but what the hell is wrong with me?  Even the fact that I dwell solely on my inability to sympathize disgusts me.
The only chance I have at an excuse is school.  There's been an unbelievable amount of work lately, and its been a *$&'% trying to keep up. I mean, it would be easy if I had just refrained from procastinating, but now that I'm in this pit I really don't feel like climbing out.  Hence the title of this post, which is a reference to.the song "Simple Twist of Fate" by Bob Dylan.
Well, now that I've finished with my confession, I suppose I can move on to slightly more interesting topics.
First, I am blogging off of Nee-san's new Android! It feels so exciting to be writing a document on a phone. Like in the movies!
I am fully submerging myself into the world of east Asian literature. I am currently reading the famous Japanese play "Chusingura", an anthology on modern Japanese poetry (the only poet who has caught my attention so far is Takamura Kotaro.  See my other blog for details) and the classic "Rickshaw Boy" by She Lao.  I recently finished the novel "The Fourth Treasure" by Todd Shimoda, another really great read.  I'm also going to try to enter the Sejong writing comoetition, so I'll be reading and doing research on the Korean classic "Cranes".
Ive cut down my manga intake to the bare essentials and am now reading little else besides Noblesse,Bakuman, Skip Beat, Oresama Sensei, and Tower of God.  Today, however, I found another manga that piqued my interest: Kimi Knife.  It's about a highschool teacher named Shiki who has to kill criminals in order to get 5 million yen (to buy medicine for his hospitalized sister, who has terminal cancer).  This kind of plot usually wouldn't interest me, but because I recently read the section in my sociology textbook about the development of morality, it seemed like a pretty good way to apply knowledge to the "real world".
Well, enough with the nonsense.  It's nice to be blogging about nothing in particular again. Jaa, Mata ne, Minna!

It doesnt matter

What do you want me to say?

Either she's lying, or I'm lying.

I've done what I could,

And I have my actions to speak for me

Either you believe me or you don't

As for me, I no longer give a shit